Page Six Has The Brit-Brit 411

A spy in Spears’ camp told PAGE SIX, “She is trying to repossess the $200,000 Ferrari she bought him. She is sick and tired of his partying ways and the constant flow of complete drug addicts coming in and out of her house.”
The fight that led to Spears booting Federline from their home reportedly began over his having his “weedman” — or pot dealer — over to the house and hanging around their newborn son, Sean Preston.
After she kicked Federline out on Thursday, Spears went out dancing at Los Angeles hot spot LAX. […]
“[Lynne] insists on doing everything for the baby,” our source continued. “She feeds it, she cleans it, she bathes it, and she won’t let Kevin touch him. She says Kevin holds it wrong, that he doesn’t know what he is doing — he has two other kids! Britney gets mad when he complains because she says, ‘My mom is doing everything, leave her alone!’

All's Well That Ends Well

Brit-Brit and K-Fed suffered a minor setback when he moved into The Beverly Hills Hotel for some time away from his wife and new son. After separate vacations in Vegas and talk of divorce, the couple agreed to give their marriage another go. The score is now K-Fed:3, Brit's Mother:0.

The "Candid" TomKat

Those balloons make a perfect backdrop for this kiss and if we didn't know better we might suspect that this was a staged photo.

The Holiday TomKat

Family Man Tom Cruise visited NYC during the holidays and this "candid" photo proves that he and Katie Holmes are truly in love. Really and truly.

Hot As Haiti

After wasting several years with Leonardo DiCaprio, it looks like Gisele may have found someone as hot as her, if that's possible. Kelly Slater is a definite upgrade.

When Irish Eyes Are Smiling

Hottie McHot-Hot Colin Farrell has entered rehab after overdosing on cocaine while shooting the neverending 'Miami Vice' movie with Jamie Foxx. While Florida was hit with several hurricanes this year, the shoot seems to be running extraordinarily long despite the weather and it may have something to do with Colin's late nights (that's just a guess). We hope he rocks his rehab and is back to himself by next week so the celebrity revolving door of rehab can be ready for Billy Joel. Our calculations have him entering after the holidays.

Jersey In The House

We love us some Tara Reid and are thrilled that she's not letting the cancellation of her show get her down during the holidays. While looking for some Tara news on the web we found this account on bitterwaitress.com which made us feel all warm inside. Enjoy.

"Last Super Bowl, Tara Reid came into the Starbucks where I used to work. She was as drunk as a skunk and hanging out with four or five slutty girls wearing next to nothing. She asked if we could blend her a drink and add a few splashes of vodka (which she pulled out of her fake Fendi purse...eww). I told her we weren't a bar and there were no margaritas on our menu and she lunged over the counter screaming "DONT YOU KNOW WHO THE FUCK I AM!?!?!?" I told her that I knew who she was and still could not help her. She then did the most horribly embarrassing thing I could imagine. She turned to a male co worker of mine, lifted up her skanky tank top and said "ARE MY TITS BETTER AT CONVINCING YOU!?!?!"
I told her to put her funbags away and leave."

Nicole Richie And Fiancee Are Dunzo

Just when we were about to believe that Hollywood starlets and porn-stars actually loved their men, we were totally reminded that this is all a big spin machine that Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton are feeding the public. Nicole Richie announced that she and her fiancee were breaking up today which gave us a reason to run this photo of Jessica Simpson and her oversized collagen fish lips. (She and Nick are working some split spin lately so it seems related...to us anyway). Nicole was a heroin addict and became a reality star with her best friend Paris. The two "broke up" as friends and then they each got engaged. Said engagements were then broken and somewhere in there Nicole snorted a ton of trimspa which made her lose a ton of weight and all of this made her super famous. Nicole and Paris played this shit all along and that's why they never talk about the real reason they're not friends anymore. Just like TomKat never talks about how they met. Always keep them guessing. Well played ladies.

Brad Adopts The Kids

Maddox and Zahara Jolie will now have the last name Jolie-Pitt. Seriously. He filed a petition in court and everything to have them be officially his children. Those kids are going to be the most well-adjusted young adults ever.

Princess Affleck Arrives Among Us

Two days after her show Alias was cancelled, Jen Garner induced her labor and gave birth to a beautiful baby girl whom they named Violet. Congrats.

The Most Sour Thing

Over the weekend we caught ourselves enthralled with 'The Sweetest Thing' on cable and wondered why Christina Applegate was still married. EVERYbody knows that Hollywood IT Girls are not cool if they're married. And then there it was like a an early Christmas present, the announcement that Christina Applegate was getting divorced. Let the games begin.

Tabloids Are Funny

It's crunch time for Victoria Gotti and Bonnie Fuller after Nick and Jessica announced they broke up. Celebrity Living has the WORLD EXCLUSIVE story on their plans to adopt a baby, and Star has a photo of a pregnant Jessica. Gotti beats out Fuller with her fake baby story because she doesn't have to do the miscarriage story like Star did to follow up the fake pregnancy they gave Demi Moore over the summer. It's only a matter of time before Gotti and Fuller start directly attacking each other and somebody gets whacked. We miss The Sopranos.

Maddox Is All Grown Up

Maddox has benefited from Brad's love affair with his momma Angelina and has now found a new best friend and the confidence to walk on his own. Bravo.

We Love Nick

Five days after officially announcing his split from wife Jessica Simpson, Nick Lachey and the WB network started promoting the new show Nick will star in as a 'newlywed' baseball player. The show is being developed by a co-creator of 'Mad About You' and is set to air next fall. Here's hoping his tv marriage lasts longer than his real one.

Better Late Than Never

Ugly drinking guaranteed.

Tara Celebrates

It's amazing how different she looks from the invite, the photo which she also used on an invite during Taradise. We suspect she's ready to tackle Broadway after her recent career defeat. Or Playboy. Whichever.

A Smart Move For Tom

Tom finally replaced his publisister with a professional media rep so we probably won't be seeing much more of Crazy Tom Cruise, but Family Man TomKat is in full swing.

Simpson Distraction

Following Ashlee Simpson's drunken tirade in a Canadian Mickey D's, Papa Joe Simpson trotted out his client/daughter, Jessica to distract us all. Seriously, this marriage between Nick & Jessica is getting boring and it's either time for a baby or a divorce. Or another reality show.

Madonna Rocks

Madge performed at the MTV Europe Video Awards and stuck to her purple disco theme. Holy toned lady.

Happy Belated Birthday Tara

In honor of Tara turning the big Three-Oh, we watched the Taradise episode where she's in Sardinia. It was very, very long and inspired a new level of pity for our gal. But Roberto Cavalli has a kick-ass yacht.

Paris Is Still A Nasty Porn-Star

At least we can always count on her to be consistent.

What's Eating Loser Leo?

Supermodel Gisele Bundchen finally dumped Leonardo DiCaprio making this the first exciting thing to happen in Hollywood in weeks. Gisele has taken up with Kelly Slater, a surfer, and apparently Leo is way depressed about the whole thing. George Clooney, whom she asked out years ago (he declined saying he was too old) should arrange a meeting between his BFF Brad Pitt and Gisele. Then everyone* would live happily ever after.

*This does not include Leo, Angelina or Jenifer Aniston.

Vaughniston Lives

Vince Vaughn is yucky. And what's with the grunge plaid? Maybe it's 1991 in Chicago?

Germany Has Tabloids?

Henry looks like he'd rather be sleeping.

Sell, Sell, Sell

People magazine is paying millions for these photos and K-Fed's sex for money scheme has come full circle. There is, however, the slight chance that Brit feels like she's selling out her son and won't go through with the deal, but that's just a rumor and they need to buy Cheetos.

And Then Stage A Kidnapping Plot....

Mrs. David Beckham explains the finer points of making a sham marriage work. Too bad for Katie that she's not fake marrying David Beckham.

It's The End Of The World As We Know It

Nobody likes a quitter so we hope it's just a rumor that Tara gave up drinking. Sauced up or sober, for the love of God, please hem your jeans already.

TomKitten Makes An Appearance

We're no experts on pregnancy but it seems that Kate Cruise is four or five months along which means she got pregnant a few weeks after they started dating. This photo is from the cover of Life & Style and the accompanying article claims that Katie's father is pissed that they didn't get married before pro-creating and said that Tom is "no good." Tom's people are saying that hopefully the pregnancy will put to rest the rumors that their relationship is a hoax. We're guessing Katie had one last fling with her ex-fiancee and she's actually carrying Chris Klein's baby.

Tara Loves Her Ex-Lax

Page Six ran this today, "Which surgically-enhanced starlet ate Ex-Lax every day on the set of her recently-canceled TV show in a desperate bid to stay svelte?" And if that wasn't enough, Tara blabbed on and on to Steppin' Out magazine: “How many more years are [the media] going to pick on me? There’s other new young bad girls. Move on to someone else! … I need one more great movie role so they say, ‘Wow, she can act! She’s a great actress.’ Then I think they’ll leave me alone … If I’m going to try and do something, it has to happen this year. I’m not stupid.” […] “People think [I am just a party girl], and it’s bull[bleep],” she ranted to Hayden. “I wish they would just tell the truth. I’m not a drunk … I don’t have a drinking problem. I don’t have a drug problem, for sure. “Listen, if I could get good movies, you would never see me going out. But when there’s nothing to do, what am I supposed to do, just sit in my house and go crazy? But going out is not all I do.“I’m just fed up. I just want a chance again. I want to show that I am an actress … I just wish a director would believe in me.“The gossip reporters know the truth. They know they could write good things about me. They could write I’m a good person who is cleaning up her act. I am getting older, and I want different things in my life. I want to get married and have kids. “I’ve had a million publicists, and they’ve done nothing for me … Publicists are supposed to fight for me and believe in me, and they don’t do that. They don’t!
“I thought ‘Taradise’ was going to help me … I wanted to show the whole world the truth — I’m fun … But do I think it was cut like that? No. It could have been a better show … I didn’t want to look like a total party-girl drug retard. I think the shots they show aren’t fair.”

At this rate Tara will be in a rehab with American Pie co-star Natasha Lyonne before too long.

Liar, Liar, Pants On Fire

A member of Brit's entourage is threatening to release a videotape of her and K-Fed having sex before she got preggers and those who've seen it were disgusted by it and agreed the scene was pathetic. Brit bragged on her reality show, Chaotic, that she had a HOT sex life with K-Fed but we think she was just trying to make Justin jealous.

Lohan Cracks Her Car Up Again

This time she smashed into a van at a high rate of speed and the police say the paparazzi were not involved. Valium, Linds, valium.

The Time Has Come

Jessica and Nick released a statement denying a break-up (we've heard that before), but Jess was in Vegas over the weekend at Ashlee's 21st birthday party and Nick was a no-show. Chin-up Nick. xoxo

Those Crazy Cruises

Tom's sister/publicist announced that Tom and Katie are expecting a baby and that Tom and the whole family are very excited and Katie is doing wonderful. Obviously she no longer has her own publicist which means the next step is changing her name to 'Kate Cruise' and they can rule the planet when the aliens return.

J.Lo Takes Some Heat

On tonight's episode of Next Top Model, Tyra described a sweatsuit as being "so over" and said, "Like the J-Lo thing." Meow.

Another Celebrity Bust-Up

Porn-star Paris Hilton announced on Friday that she was ending her engagement to Paris Latsis and over the weekend she was publicly making out with another Greek, Stavros Niarchos, who recently dated Mary-Kate Olsen. Paris will keep the $5 million engagement ring which works out to $1 mil for every month they were engaged. In related news, Tara Reid (BFF to Paris) told Britain's Arena magazine, "What she's done in her career and what I've done are two different things. I've never done porn. I've never made one. I'm not stupid enough to put myself on video." We don't expect Tara to be sitting at the cool kids' table anytime soon.

What Would Jesus Say, Jessica?

Miss Jessica has been a bit truculent with the paparazzi lately and has been photographed at least three times in the past month not wearing any wedding ring. There has been no response to reports that the 'Newlyweds' have already signed divorce papers and recent news has been all about little sis Ashley. The WB has hired Warren Littlefield (of Friends and Seinfeld) and Darren Starr to develop the station and they are allegedly creating a show just for Nick. We can't wait. We love Nick.

Here's A Story, Of A Lovely Lady...

We're happy to report that Brit-Brit seems to be back to her old self, resting in the sun while reading tabloid magazines. The radio dj on 98Q said that Brit and K-Fed will receive $FIVE million dollars for the exclusive photos of the baby and the birthing video. No offense, but we'd rather not see someone giving birth as 'The Miracle Of Life' in the eighth grade was enough for us. Circle of Life aside, we're pleased to see that K-Fed is earning his keep.

Page Six Sums It All Up

September 28, 2005 -- YESTERDAY was a sad day for celebrity marriages. Not only did Chad Michael Murray and Sophia Bush call it quits after just five months, but Kathy Griffin and her hubby of four years, Matt Moline, called it a day. In Griffin's case, the couple split because of irreconcilable differences — which can't be said of Murray and Bush. Murray, who cheated on her during their engagement (he hooked up with castmate Paris Hilton while filming "The House of Wax"), kept right on cheating after they wed. According to Us Weekly, "He cheats on her constantly and doesn't even try to hide it." Another cheater? A.J. DiScala, the hubby/manager of "Sopranos" star Jamie-Lynn DiScala, the magazine says. Meanwhile, Tori Spelling, who cheated on and left her hubby Charlie Shanian last week, has moved in with the object of her lust, actor Dean McDermott.

Tara Does Vegas

From today's NY Daily News-'Not to keep playa-hatin' on Tara Reid, but we hear the most-uttered phrase over the weekend was, "Oh my God, Tara Reid fell on me." At one point, the party barnacle cornered poor Usher near the Venetian pool and told the singer he should write a song about her. "He looked terrified and slowly backed away," our spy reports.'

My Life On The D-ivorce List

We can not even believe that Kathy Griffin and Matt Moline are getting divorced. As loyal watchers of 'My Life On The D-List' on Bravo this past summer, we grew to love Kathy and Matt together. He's a big teddy bear and the two of them were so in love on the show. What happened? After four and a half years of marriage Kathy files for divorce? Just Like That? In the time between the Oscars (which Kathy hosted for E! and was the finale of her reality show's first season) and today, some serious shit went down. We'll continue our Red Wine Coverage while we work through our stages of denial.

Shed A Little Tear For Tara

Miss Reid spent the day shopping in SoHo and wore this very odd skirt. Apparently the crash and burn phase of her life has many facets and we can look forward to more hideous examples of her Jersey taste in the months to come.

Dude, Where's My Wife?

The mating game in Hollywood is B-A-N-A-N-A-S. Ashton and Demi were married on Saturday night in a last minute Kaballah ceremony in Beverly Hills. Among the 100 guests were Bruce Willis and Wilmer Valda-who? The real news is the break-ups and there are a bunch. Officially, we have heard from Meadow Soprano (Jamie Lynn Discala) who split with her husband and manager, A.J. Discala. We knew this was doomed as soon as she changed her professional name from Jamie Lynn Sigler to Jamie Lynn Discala. Look at how that worked out for Rebecca Romaine Lettuce Stamos, who by the way is engaged to Jerry O'Connell. He's the chubby kid from 'Stand By Me' and Cush from 'Jerry Maguire' and brother to last season's bachelor. We digress. Jamie Lynn Sigler/Discala is BFF with Jessica Simpson so we will not be surprised when Nick and Jess make their split announcement. Then there's Renee and Kenny, Tori Spelling and Charlie Shanahan and some kids from some show on the WB; Chad Michael Murray and Sophia Bush, and this one is juicy with him reportedly screwing Paris Hilton when they filmed 'House of Wax.' Paris is reportedly on the outs with fiancee Paris because his family thinks she's a low-rent whore and an embarassment and forbid him to marry her. Rick and Kathy Hilton flew to Greece to meet his parents and the Latsis family had their servants turn them away. They wouldn't even meet them to say hello. To Miss Paris we say, "Take good care of your reputation. It will live longer than you do."

Brit's Baby Blues

It's no secret that K-Fed's only income is derived from selling photos of he and Brit to magazines so we're not surprised that Hello! magazine has offered $2 million for the first shots of baby Sean Justin (we meant to say Preston). K-Fed forgot his first wedding anniversary on the 18th which added to Brit's grief over having gained 51 pounds during her pregnancy. Brit's new fragrance, Fantasy, is hitting shelves and being advertised with a commercial that features K-Fed shooting a love arrow at Brit and them living "happily ever after."

Those British Are So Cheeky

Celebrities often make deals with tabloids so that they don't publish damaging photos and/or interviews. Matt LeBlanc did it with the Enquirer and we didn't hear from the limo driver that drove around while Matt picked up hustlers for gay sex. Kate Moss sued and won money from the Mirror after they said she was in a coke-induced coma a few years ago, which she probably was, and now they got their payback with the photos. Not to be masters of the obvious or anything, but Kate should have left well enough alone and ignored the tabloid. Europe's largest fashion retailer, H&M, dropped Moss after initially offering her a second chance, Chanel is not renewing Kate's contract and now the police have launched an investigation into her habit.

*UPDATE*Burberry also just cancelled Kate's contract.

Time To Call It Quits

Tori Spelling, aka Donna Martin, and her husband have separated after one year of marriage. Renee Zelwegger and her country-singing husband have also split up with Renee requesting an annulment of their four month marriage based on "fraud". No word on whether Angelina Jolie played a part in either bust up.

Kate Says She's Sorry

From Yahoo!:Supermodel Kate Moss, 31, acknowledged to the Hennes & Mauritz clothing chain that tabloid allegations she recently used cocaine are true, an H&M spokeswoman said. Moss, who is to model one of H&M's upcoming clothing lines, apologized for her drug use and promised in writing to abide by a company policy that models be "healthy, wholesome and sound," spokeswoman Liv Asarnoj said. "We strongly disapprove of her action," Asarnoj said Saturday. "We feel that this is very unfortunate." She said Moss had acknowledged the allegations of drug use were true. "That's why she was so regretful," Asarnoj said. "We are giving her a second chance."
The Daily Mirror tabloid printed images from a video which it said showed the model doing five lines of cocaine in 40 minutes at a late-night music recording session.

Thank You Tyra Banks

'Tyra' premiered last week and host, Tyra Banks, shared with viewers what happens when you don't spend every waking moment at the gym (or snorting TrimSpa). As a model for Victoria's Secret and Producer/Host of 'America's Next Top Model', Tyra is trying to make a go of a daytime talk show which doesn't seem to be working out too well. She tried to start a music career during Top Model's second season , going as far as producing an elaborate video for her first (and last) single. We love Top Model and look forward to seeing Banks discuss her weight (what she calls "her big ol' booty") with this season's anorexic/bulimic and/or full-figured model.

Mystery Revealed

Apparently there is a video in addition to photos of Kate enjoying TrimSpa at a London recording studio with her druggie boyfriend Pete Dougherty. Now we know how she stays so thin.

Best Wishes & Big Kisses

Congratulations Brit-Brit and K-Fed! Our favorite gal had a son on Wednesday in Santa Monica, and she named him Sean Preston Spears Federline. Or Michael Preston or London Preston, depending on the tabloid. This is Brit’s first child and the third for Kevin.