For The Love Of God, Put Those Away.

Rick has a beer gut and Kathy's boobs are totally falling out of her dress. Being that Kathy was the voice of cartoon Barbie a kajillion years ago, Paris is trying to follow in her mother's footsteps. By the looks of it, she on her way to being some kind of Barbie doll. The kind maybe where you burnt the doll's hair with Mommy's lighter and pretended Barbie was doing naughty things with Ken. And then dressed her in a hideous turquoise dress from the 80's. We're sorry, Paris already is that kind of doll. Our mistake.

Lohan And Richie Promote The Colombian Powder Diet

Lohan To Host Saturday Night Live Season Finale

Carry My Kid, Bitch!

Bridget Jones Married This Guy Today

While we were unpacking and lining shelves, Renee Zelwegger went off and got married to Kenny Chesney, a big-time country singer. Our friend, Jen, just loves him. They tied the knot in St. John, which is cool because we just love St. Croix, which is in the same group of islands. But Bridget, why on a Monday?! Maybe you're a Bangles fan (we are too) but there are better ways to show your admiration. Next time you get married, rethink the day.

Gay Or Straight, Tom Cruise Is Hot

Tara Reid And Tommy Lee?

Carson Daly Is A Loser

Katie Holmes' Finger Toes

Reese Is Not Happy

Ever since a pack of paparazzi chased Reese Witherspoon nearly causing her to crash , she is really, really pissed. The director of Monster-In-Law said Reese was a nightmare to work with when he directed her in Legally Blonde and we're still sticking to our story that she is preggers which wreaks havoc on hormones. Add that to the rumors that her husband likes to get it on with other men.....we'd be fucking pissed too. Go get em' Reese but please don't go mental like Cameron Diaz. Thanks.

Tom Cruise Is NOT Gay, He's Dating Katie Holmes

Brit's Baby Loves Houston's


It's no surprise that Brit's short-lived restaurant in NYC (NyLa) was such a disappointment considering her taste in food. She and the K-Fed have been renting a house in Scottsdale, Arizona and dining at Houston's and The Cheesecake Factory. Next week she'll be appearing at T.G.I.F.'s and Chili's.

Brit's Baby Loves Cheesecake Factory

And The Plot Thickens....

Oompa-Loompa Doompity-Do

Rachel Hunter's Club Look

"Lipstick On Your Teeth Is Hott."

Beyonce Down Under

Slick Willy At BLT Steakhouse

The news is that Slick Willy has been spending a great deal of time with the blonde in this photo who happens to be a billionaire and in Canadian politics. No word from Hilary's camp but we imagine these two will stop flaunting their relationship all over Manhattan with the likes of Jack Nicholson and Jerry Bruckheimer. There could be the possibility that they are "just friends" but we give that a snowball's chance in hell. Now that he has to eat really healthy for his heart, his appetite for other vices has surely kicked in. And we all remember what he likes. A lot.

Jack Nicholson At BLT Steakhouse